A Break in the Storm

Image found here: http://doidasafada.blogspot.com/2009/09/linda.html

It's been raining all day here in Virginia, which is an appropriate setting for how I've been feeling lately. We've had a few calls here and there lately that have taken us down one rabbit hole after another only to find us falling fast onto a hard, impenetrable concrete floor. No one ever said this was going to be easy.

Regardless, Robert and I still believe that one of these leads will take us right through the looking glass. There, we hope to find the right situation for us - a baby whose mom (and maybe even dad) has chosen to place her child in our care. Because of that, we'll continue to take the midnight phone calls and set up appointments that never come to fruition and talk to strangers who say this is going to be the one only to be let down once again, staring at a phone that doesn't ring again.

They say never give up. And we're not. But some days the waiting just wrenches it right out of you. Someday this will all be a distant memory. Some day, all of this energy will redirect itself to something important - a child who deserves the world. When that happens, we'll be there to give it to him or her, whomever that may be.

Happy leap day, everyone!

The Best Days are Do Nothing Days

We've had the best weekend so far ... we've done absolutely nothing! Sometimes do nothing days are the very best days, don't you agree?

Yesterday we laid around all day in our pajamas, watching garbage television, skimming Facebook, reading and lying around with the dogs. I journaled and flipped through magazines - Better Homes & Gardens, Martha Stewart Living and Yoga Journal - dreaming about new wall colors and furniture, and brushing up on the latest yoga news. In fact, I didn't get out of my pajamas until around 5:00, when I took a bath with Bath & Body Works Vanilla Verbena foam bath and a candle. (I love Bath and Body Works' aromatherapy line.) Gosh I'm starting to sound like a dang commercial!

We both went to bed around 9pm and woke up this morning to a day of sunshine. It is absolutely beautiful in Virginia today! It's around 50 degrees and sunny. There's not a cloud in the sky. Robert is playing in a soccer scrimmage this afternoon so I plan to join him at the park. I'll probably walk around the fields to get some exercise then hang out and watch. I may actually take pictures if I can get close enough to the goal!

Do nothing days are the best for recharging your batteries. Do nothing days are a way to give yourself some love - to tell yourself that you are important. What have you done for yourself lately? Have you had a do nothing day?

Because It's Friday

And because it's not sunny in Virginia today ...

Pic found at: http://www.etsy.com/listing/61948080/sunny-sun

Have the most lovely Friday ever!!

Cover of book found here: http://www.thirdchoicebooks.com/

When Robert and I first decided to adopt, we worked with an adoption agency to complete our initial home study. As part of that home study, we were asked to read The Third Choice - A Woman's Guide to Placing a Child for Adoption. It was my first introduction to adoption from the perspective of a birth mother. 

We've been on this adoption journey now for over a year. Still, I often refer back to that book to remind myself about the brave women who choose adoption for their children. I think it's important for those who would like to adopt to educate themselves about all aspects of adoption. Yes, it's a happy time for an individual or couple who are adopting, but it's also a sad time for the person who has chosen as a mother to allow her child to be brought up by someone else. 

Here are some of my favorite quotes from the book. Remember, this book is written for women who are considering adoption for their child:

• It is your right to ask for as much information as you need in order to make a good decision.
• No matter what your circumstances, there is almost always an appropriate family available who will want to adopt your child. You have a greater chance of finding them of you are straightforward about your history and situation.
• After you have met with all of the prospectiveparents that interested you, the decision is now in your hands. Chances are, you already have a pretty good idea who the parents of your child will be. Some birthmothers say they felt a tremendous relief when they found the adoptive parents for their child, like a burden was lifted from their shoulders. Other birthparents agonized over the decision. It is often just a matter of your style in making decisions. Take your time, and do it according to your own timeline.
• By the time a couple contacts and adoption organization [or adoption attorney], chances are, they have spent a number of years trying to have a baby on their own.

Women who choose adoption for their children have so much to think about - just as adoptive couples do. Robert and I have already been through a couple of near misses, one where the birth mother decided to keep her child just as we were packing up to drive 13 hours and meet her at the hospital. Some days it seems like we will never have the opportunity to adopt. Then, other days, when I'm feeling more realistic, I have compassion - both for Robert and I, and for the women who are going through an unplanned pregnancy and who are faced with a difficult decision. 

Birth Mom Posts About Adoption Language

I read a lot of blogs and websites about adoption. I want to be as educated as possible about adoption so I can be the best parent possible when we are matched. I read an interesting post today on America Adopts! It's written by and from the perspective of a birth mother.

Have a read: Birth Mothers Are People Too

I'll be interested to hear what you think, whether you are a birth mother yourself, someone who is considering adoption for her child, an adoptive parent, a hopeful adoptive parent, or simply just someone who happened upon Adoption Is a Powerful Choice.